KaSi

Every time you unlock the kevlar vest around your heart you risk having someone look for the opening.  I knew all along it was a possibility, but I had not anticipated that it would be like this.  Instant connection and promises of something.  Just as quickly as it started, it came racing to an unanticipated and abrupt end, marred by an incredibly confusing text message.  Stunned I have asked why and have heard that "...it's not me..." and that an actual phone call would be forthcoming...but that was two weeks ago.  I have to let go and move along, as there is nothing to see here.  No wreckage or damage that others need to gawk at.  No visible scars; no tears, no harm and no foul.

Letting go when I don't know why makes it awful.  But in order for me to do better I have to simply assume the worst and forgive.  I can use this feeling to be so careful in the future while I try to be genuine and open while still zipping up that kevlar vest again.